Posts Tagged ‘m. dawn thacker’

Mine, All Mine

February 14, 2015

We share a coffee cup. We never used to. At one time I drank my morning caffeine from the ceramic mug Bruce bought especially for me. I still have it. It’s white and decorated with pastel colored conversation hearts, those little valentine shaped candies that began speaking in text before texting came about,  “Luv U”, “4 ever”, “T-4-2”, “B Mine.”  He gave me that mug, not on Valentine’s Day, but for no reason at all. It sits far back in the dish cabinet now next to its mate.

His mug, the mate to mine, is also white, but with a larger handle to fit the width of Bruce’s hand when he holds it. The mug sports a blue oval with the Ford Motor Company logo across its middle. Bruce’s first truck, his first love, was a Ford.  The mug came from a box and contents he bought at a local auction sale. I still remember the grin on his face when he held it up, having just been named high bidder.

For years, the mugs sat side by side on the counter each morning waiting for the pot to brew. Two spoonfuls of sugar and a dash of cream waited in each. One teaspoon stirred both mugs. I would set the coffee maker the night before, and Bruce would bring me my own cup of coffee in bed the next morning to help wake me.

I can’t remember the exact date we graduated to the one cup, but I know where we found it. There’s a thrift store called the Green Olive Tree half a mile from our house. We visit there on occasion for treasure hunts. Both of us spotted the mug at the same time and reached for it, a piece of handmade pottery, signed on the bottom by its maker. The colors, graduations of blue, green, and brown, drizzled in rivulets down its side. The mug was taller and bigger around than each of ours, the handle, a nice wide rectangle.  Bruce weighed the pottery in his right hand, testing it. He held the handle, examined the lip for chips. Then, he offered it to me. I cradled the piece of art, running my left hand over the colors, feeling its perfect weight balanced in my hand. I pretended to drink from it.  We placed the prize, an original, in our basket and bought it for a dollar.

Not long after, Bruce brought the new mug to me one morning in bed. I took the cup, drank from it, and closed my eyes savoring that first taste of the day. When I opened my eyes he was looking at me smiling. “That’s my cup you know,” he said. “I saw it first.”

“No you didn’t,” I said. “I saw it first. It’s mine.”

“You can’t have it,” he said.

“Yes I can,” I said with force. “But I’ll share. Here, you can have a taste.” I handed the mug back to him for a sip.  He took the mug from me, drinking from it as he turned to leave the room. 

“Hey,” I called after him. “My coffee!” 

He laughed, then placed the mug on the dresser as he left the room.

I carried it with me to the bathroom, taking a drink before brushing my teeth. Bruce came in to shave, and I handed him the mug so I could go get dressed.

I was in the hallway, headed to the kitchen when Bruce handed me the newly filled mug. “Take care of my cup,” he said laughing before he kissed me goodbye. He tasted of coffee.

I stood on the porch watching him walk to the truck. As he opened the door, he turned and looked at me. I raised the mug in a toast to my husband and smiled. “Possession is nine-tenths of the law,” I said, looking from Bruce to the mug and back to Bruce again. “And that means, it’s mine,” I said, “all mine.” And I could hear his laughter over the truck’s motor as he drove away.

Ride Like the Wind

March 20, 2013

thirsty

She sat on the kitchen floor, playing with her plastic horses. She saddled up a mustang and rode across the squares of green tile, through the Indian badlands, around train robbers, and cattle rustlers. She rode fast, bent low, stopping to rest in the forest of chair legs under the kitchen table.

“Most men wouldn’t be caught dead washing dishes,” her mother teased the man at the sink. He was tall, a dishtowel over his shoulder, a cigarette in his mouth.

He laughed. “Most men wouldn’t do a lot of things I do.”

Her mother giggled, kissing him. The man’s hands came out of the water and landed on her mother’s bottom.

“Now look what you’ve done,” her mother said, smiling.

He crushed the cigarette. “Let’s get you out of these wet clothes,” he said.

“Shhh,” her mother said, pointing.

The little girl jumped on her horse, dug in her heels, closed her eyes, and rode like the wind.

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The Original Version:

Ride Like the Wind

She sat on the kitchen floor. A triangle of sunshine from the window spread across the linoleum making a paddock for her plastic horses. She lined them up side by side to feast on grain and hay. Her favorite was a brown mustang with a white mane and tale. She’d take him from the herd and ride across the squares of green tile, through the Indian badlands and around gangs of train robbers and cattle rustlers. She was brave and free, riding fast, bent low over her horse’s neck, the wind blowing her hair back from her face. They’d stop to rest only after reaching the forest of chair legs under the kitchen table. It was safe there. She had cover.

“I like watching you wash dishes,” her mother said to the man at the sink. The little girl peeked out from under the man’s shirt hanging on the back of the chair. He was tall, wearing his green work pants and a white undershirt. He had a dishtowel thrown over his shoulder, and a cigarette in his mouth. He was up to his elbows in soap bubbles. “Most men wouldn’t be caught dead washing dishes,” her mother teased.

The man laughed and talked around his cigarette. “Most men wouldn’t do a lot of things I do.”

Her mother giggled, stood on tip toe and kissed the man’s cheek. His hands came out of the water and landed on her bottom.

“Now look what you’ve done,” she fussed, twisting around to look behind her at the wet spots on her jeans. She wasn’t mad though, she was smiling.

The man pulled the cigarette from his mouth and crushed it out in the ashtray. “I think we need to get you out of those wet clothes,” he whispered.

Her mother shushed him and pointed at the child.

The little girl ducked behind the cover of the man’s shirt.

Her horse whinnied, ready to ride again. She jumped on his back, dug her heels into his flanks, closed her eyes, and rode like the wind.

Friday Fictioneers’ (http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/) is hosted every week by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. It’s a pretty awesome idea that goes like this: A weekly photograph is posted and the writer is challenged to create a 100-word story or poem inspired by the photo. Post your work on your blog and link it to the Friday Fictioneers’ post where comments and feedback are shared. Give it a shot! This week’s photograph is by Douglas McIlroy.

Her Still, Perfect Form (part 3-fin)

March 10, 2013

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Part 1 here: https://trainswhistle.wordpress.com/2013/02/24/her-still-perfect-form-part-1/

Part 2 here: https://trainswhistle.wordpress.com/2013/03/03/her-still-perfect-form-part-2/

Part 3

Emma was in the bed by the door, oxygen tubing in her nose, an IV attached to her bruised arm. Her eyes were closed.

“Oh my God, what happened?” Jack asked. “Was she in some sort of an accident? Emma, Sweetheart, can you hear me?”

Emma opened her eyes and gave a faint smile. “Hello Jack,” she said in a whisper.

“Do you know who this is?” Jack asked.

“Of course I know who you are Jack,” she said, before closing her eyes again.

He took her hand in his. “It’s cold as ice,” he said, rubbing it between his two. Then, he bowed his head and said to no one in particular, “Oh God, what happened to my baby?”

The driver put a hand on Jack’s shoulder, and said, “Emma fell last week, and broke her hip.”

“Oh my poor baby,” he said. “I know how that feels. I fell on a rail in the coal mines one time and dislocated my hip. It was so painful. Do you think she’s in pain? Emma, are you in pain, Sweetheart?” he asked.

Emma opened her eyes again and said, “Everything hurts.”

“I’m going to the desk to find the nurse, Jack,” the driver said. “You sit here with Emma. I’ll be right back.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Jack said.

In a few minutes the nurse came into the room with a syringe.

Jack looked up. “I’m Jack Arthur, Emma’s husband. What happened to her?” he asked.

“She had surgery on her hip,” the nurse said.

“What?” Jack asked.

In a louder voice, the nurse re-stated, “She fell and broke her hip. She had surgery on Saturday.”

“Oh my poor Emma,” Jack said. “Why didn’t someone tell me she fell? When did this happen? I could have been here with her.”

Jack turned back to Emma and took her hand. He rubbed and patted it, watching her face. She opened her eyes and tried to smile at him.

The nurse looked at Jack and then at the driver. “I’m so sorry,” she said, shaking her head.

The nurse injected the syringe of medicine into the IV and left the room.

“The nurse gave her some pain medication, Jack,” the driver said. “She’ll probably sleep now. I think we should let her rest.”

Jack pushed up from the wheelchair with effort. His legs shook, barely holding his weight as he leaned over Emma’s frail body. He stroked her cheek with bent fingers. Putting his face very close to hers, he asked again, “Do you know who this is?”

Emma looked so small and fragile there in the bed with tubes running from her arm and to her nose with oxygen. Her usually neat, coiffed hair was in a tangle on her head and her face was so pale it blended with the white of the pillow case. She looked up at Jack and said again, “Of course I know who you are Jack.”

He had turned his good ear to her mouth after he asked the question. “Of course you know who I am,” he said. “I’m the man who beats you within an inch of your life every day.”

Emma smiled. They both chuckled at the long running joke between them. Jack moved his hand to Emma’s shoulder. It was bare where the faded blue and white hospital gown had slipped off. Her shoulder was thin and fit in Jack’s palm. He rubbed her skin before pulling the gown back up. He moved in close again, right over Emma’s face and said, “I need you to get better and come back to me. I miss you.”

Emma closed her eyes tightly, then opened them again. She lifted her hand with effort to Jack’s head and smoothed his white hair. She put on a weak smile again and whispered, “I miss you too.”

As he had done every night since they were married, Jack kissed her forehead, then, each of her eyelids, and finally, moved to her mouth. Emma lifted her lips to his and they kissed each other three times in succession, gently, with only a breath of sound. “I’m going now so you can rest,” Jack said. “You behave, no running after good looking doctors.”

Emma closed her eyes and shook her head, smiling again at her Jack. “You can always make me laugh Jack, even when I don’t think it’s in me,” she said.

Emma came back to the nursing home a few days later, back to room 242, back to Jack, but with a new diagnosis of bone cancer. Surgery to repair the hip was unsuccessful. Morphine kept her comfortable. She slept most of the time with Jack by her side, holding her hand. His worry was etched in the lines on his forehead. Emma awakened sometimes when he kissed her forehead. She reassured him with her smile.

Emma had no appetite and her disinterest in food carried over to Jack. Staff members encouraged him, telling him he needed to keep his strength up for Emma. That afternoon, Jack finally accepted a bowl of his favorite soup. He bowed his head over the bowl and sent up a prayer for his Emma.

As he brought the spoon to his mouth, soup spilled onto the front of his starched white shirt. He looked down at the stain, and frowned. As he unbuttoned his shirt, his hands began to shake and tears welled in his eyes. He finished stripping the shirt off and wiped his eyes with it, then threw it to the floor. He wheeled to the closet, pulled out a fresh one, struggled into it, and fastened the buttons. He pushed the wheeled table with the bowl of soup on it out to the hallway and closed the door.

Jack hadn’t taken his colored pencils out since Emma fell. His worry had filled him, and his inspiration had slipped away.

That evening, Emma opened her eyes when Jack leaned in to kiss her.

She lifted her hand to his cheek with effort. “You need a shave handsome,” she whispered, smiling.

Jack reached up and put his hand over hers, pulled her palm to his mouth and kissed it. They held each other’s gaze until Emma’s eyes closed.

A little while later, he wheeled over to the night stand and gathered his sketchpad. Going back over to Emma’s bedside, he took out his pencil and began drawing her still, perfect form.

Her Still, Perfect Form (Part 2)

March 3, 2013

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link to Part 1:
https://trainswhistle.wordpress.com/2013/02/24/her-still-perfect-form-part-1/

On Saturday afternoon Jack came out of the room looking for Emma. He wandered the long hallways, knocking on doors, peering inside to see if she was there. That night, his usual sound sleep was interrupted. He got himself up in the wheelchair to check her bed. She was gone. He wondered where she was, what had happened to her. It wasn’t like her to be out after dark, gone in the middle of the night. He wheeled to the door of the room and asked a nursing assistant passing by if she had seen his wife.

“She’s still in the hospital Jack.”

“In the hospital? What happened? Why didn’t someone tell me?” he asked.

“We did Jack. You must have forgotten,” the nursing assistant said.

“How could I forget something like that?” he asked.

“You just woke up Jack. It’s easy to forget things when you’ve been asleep. I’ll call the hospital and check on her for you. Let me tuck you in and I’ll come back with the news,” she said.

“Thank you,” Jack said, letting the nursing assistant help him.

On Sunday, Jack fell. He had gotten the wheelchair stuck between the double doors leading to the parking lot. He was trying to pull the chair free. A nurse found him on his knees, struggling. When she asked what happened, he said, “I lost my balance. I need to find Emma.”

At lunch Monday, he wasn’t eating. “Just try a little bit Jack,” the nurse said.

“I’m worried sick,” Jack said. “I can’t take a bite of anything until she gets here. Emma is always here for lunch.”

“She’s in the hospital Jack. Remember? She fell and broke her hip Friday.”

Jack looked up, alarm on his face. “Oh, no. She fell and broke her hip?”

“Yes, on Friday. She was standing at the sink, lost her balance and fell. She broke her hip. They operated on Saturday. She’ll be home soon.”

After his shower on Tuesday, Jack stopped at the nurse’s station. “Can you tell me where Jack Arthur lives?” he asked.

“Just down the hall, Jack. Room 242. It’s the third door on the left,” the nurse said.

“Can you tell me where Emma is? I haven’t seen her this morning,” Jack said.

“She’s in the hospital, Jack.”

“In the hospital?” he asked, his voice rising, his eyes wide. “What do you mean she’s in the hospital? What happened? Why didn’t someone let me know?”

And so it went. Jack searched and asked. Staff members reassured and explained. Mid-morning, a housekeeper found Jack sitting with his head in his hands, sobbing. “I’ve lost the only woman I’ve ever loved,” he said. “Why would Emma leave me?”

A nurse called the hospital to ask someone to take a phone to Emma so she could reassure Jack. The staff there tried, but Emma’s voice was weak, and Jack’s hearing was poor.

That afternoon, the nursing home arranged for the facility bus to carry Jack to the hospital. He might not remember he had been to see Emma, but in the moment he was there, seeing her, being with her, he might find some comfort.

It had been awhile since Jack was outside. “It sure is beautiful out here. Look at all these colors. I don’t remember the trees being this big. Look at all these cars. Emma would love riding on this bus. I wish she was here. I want to tell her about this,” he said on the twenty minute trip to the hospital.

“Room 502,” the volunteer at the front desk said. “Take this hallway to the elevators. She’s on the fifth floor.”

“Fancy place,” Jack said. “Look at all these paintings. They’re beautiful. Emma would love them. She likes my drawings, but they aren’t nearly as fancy or pretty as these. She should come here and visit. Remind me to tell her about it and maybe you could bring us back here sometime.”

“Sure Jack, I’ll be glad to,” the driver said as she pushed his wheelchair toward Emma’s room.

Emma was in the bed by the door, oxygen tubing in her nose, an IV attached to her bruised arm. Her eyes were closed.

“Oh my God, what happened?” Jack asked. “Was she in some sort of an accident? Emma, Sweetheart, can you hear me?”

TBC

Her Still, Perfect Form (part 1)

February 24, 2013

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They liked to sleep in. Emma’s breathing was not the best, and it took her a while to gather energy. Jack just liked to laze in bed. Emma was usually the first one up, walking barefoot in her long flannel nightgown to the sink to wash her face and brush her teeth. She looked in the mirror, patted her hair into place and pinched her cheeks for color. Then, padding over to Jack’s bed, she leaned down and kissed him awake.

Opening his eyes, he reached up, touched her face and said, “there’s my morning sun.”

“Oh stop that foolishness Jack and get yourself up. Breakfast is coming,” she said.

They ate all three meals together in their room at the nursing home. The dining room was just too crowded and they would have to share a table with other people. Somehow, in their sixty-two years of marriage, they stayed selfish enough to be an exclusive pair. They didn’t plan to be childless, but when no babies came, it was alright.

Emma knew how to arrange a dining experience; she had lots of practice. Forty-three years before, she and Jack met at the cafeteria in town. She set tables.

“I knew she was the one for me the minute I looked at that sweet face,” Jack told everyone who met them. “Just look at her. Could you have resisted?”

“Don’t you believe his stories,” Emma said, smiling. “He didn’t really know until the second date.” Then, they both laughed.

Emma pushed their over-the-bed hospital tables together in the center of the room, covered them with a white linen cloth, and placed the vase with a silk rose in the middle. Jack had given her the flower for her birthday. When the stainless steel cart brought their meal trays down the hall, Emma assumed the role of waitress, placing the plates, glasses and utensils in perfect order on the couple’s make-shift dining table. She unfolded the napkin and tucked it under Jack’s chin. His button-up shirts never had a stain.

Jack didn’t have nice shirts until retirement. He was a hard worker, did manual labor, got his hands and clothes dirty. He and Emma lived in West Virginia. He dug coal from the age of ten. Emma had the education. She could read, Jack couldn’t.

The couple enjoyed a small mountain cabin with a garden spot out back. Electricity and running water came later on. Family was close by, and their church was just down the road. They lived in the same small town, in the same house, until Jack retired. That year, their minister died. His widow gave Jack all of the pastor’s clothes because the two men were the same size. Emma liked seeing Jack dressed up, so did Jack. Wearing those clothes made him feel a little closer to God. When he and Emma moved into the nursing home, Emma only packed Jack’s “preacher clothes.”

In the afternoon, when Emma napped, Jack drew. He used colored pencils, and though his artwork was not learned by formal training, he showed natural talent. “My Mama used to ‘oo’ and ‘ah’ over my pictures when I was a boy,” Jack said. “She would take me outside with my paper and pencils and point to trees, flowers, mountain ranges, creeks and animals for me to draw, then she’d tack the pictures up on the wall at home. She’d show them off to anyone who visited. Weren’t for her, it never would have amounted to much. Heck, didn’t really amount to much anyway, but people from as far away as town came up to the house for me to draw them. I even made a little money sometimes.”

Several of Jack’s pictures were framed and hung on the wall in his and Emma’s room. The one of Popeye was his favorite. “I always loved ‘ol Popeye. He’d pick up that can of spinach and get so strong, nothing could beat him or take his girl away,” Jack said.

Some of Jack’s projects took days, some only hours. He drew cars, trains, mountains, birds and houses. Sometimes he sketched staff members’ faces to give away as a thank you for being kind. A nursing assistant asked him once, “Where are your drawings of Emma, Jack?”

“I never drew Emma,” Jack said. “Oh I tried. Just couldn’t do her justice. Look at her. Only God could draw something so beautiful, so I drew love birds instead. That one’s her and this one’s me,” he said pointing to the pair of framed birds on the wall.

When people came to visit, Jack looked over to Emma for all the answers. His hearing was not so good anymore, and of the two, he considered her the smartest. He always had. She smiled graciously, and carried the conversation, while he smiled and nodded. Emma’s steadfastness reassured Jack.

One Saturday afternoon Jack came out of the room looking for Emma. He wandered the long hallways, knocking on doors, peering inside to see if she was there. That night, his usual sound sleep was interrupted. He got himself up in the wheelchair to check her bed. She was gone. He wondered where she was, what had happened to her. It wasn’t like her to be out after dark, gone in the middle of the night. He wheeled to the door of the room and asked a nursing assistant passing by if she had seen his wife.

Part 2 here:

https://trainswhistle.wordpress.com/2013/03/03/her-still-perfect-form-part-2/

Waiting

February 17, 2013

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If I didn’t know better, I’d say buying this house was just an excuse for Bruce to acquire another trailer. He’s obsessed with them. Is there such a thing as a hauling fetish?

“We have to be able to pull it with the Explorer,” he said.

“We have another truck you know?” I said.

“We have a flatbed work truck and a dump truck. You want to haul the stuff to the little house in Chincoteague with the dump truck?”

“Yes ,” I said, rolling my eyes. “Let’s take the dump truck and park it on the tiny lawn on Ocean Blvd.”

“See what I mean,” he said. “We need a smaller trailer, one we can park beside the house.”

I sighed. There was no sense arguing. He’d win anyway. So we built a trailer, painted it and waited for the state trooper to come approve it for tags. We loaded it and left at two-thirty on a Thursday morning, headed for Chincoteague, and a one o’clock closing appointment at the office of a lawyer on the island.

We pulled into McDonald’s parking lot at eight-thirty and went in for a cup of coffee and a long wait. Storm clouds gathered to the west and the air hung heavy. We took a corner booth and watched as a light mist turned into a solid downpour. I wondered if this was a sign. I’m always looking for metaphors, rain is a big one.

“It’s been raining like this for a week,” the man in gum boots sitting across from us said. “Mosquitoes worst I’ve ever seen.”

I was ready to run, taking my down payment, our brand new trailer filled with household items, and my dreams back home again. An epic flood and/or plague of mosquitoes was about to descend on my hopes and I didn’t seem to have sense enough to heed the warning.

“Stop worrying,” Bruce said, sighing. I looked at him. I hadn’t said a word. He patted my hand.

The phone rang at ten o’clock. It was Debbie, our real estate agent. Her son was being taken to the emergency room with shortness of breath and chest pains. Did we mind holding off on the final walk through of the house until she went to check on him? Oh dear, another sign.

I assured her that was not a problem, we didn’t have the appointment to close until one o’clock and I wasn’t worried about the walk through anyway. We had met Melva’s daughter and son-in-law on a previous visit and were certain they hadn’t stripped the house of copper pipes or aluminum siding. Debbie agreed to call as soon as she was certain her son was alright.

The phone rang at eleven-fifteen. It was Debbie. “He has pneumonia and they’ve given him some heavy doses of antibiotics. He’ll be fine. Can I meet you in ten minutes?”

We drove with windshield wipers sweeping water away at high speed and arrived at at the house at the appointed time. We pulled into Melva’s driveway. I stepped out of the truck and into soggy grass. Water seeped over the soles of my sneakers. We dashed through the door of the screen porch, and watched as rain poured off and through the green plastic awning above us. Leaks we hadn’t seen on sunny day visits dripped at our feet. Another sign, I thought.

Debbie unlocked the door to the house explaining that Melva’s daughter had been overwhelmed with packing and the ordeal of moving her things. They’d expected the house to stay on the market for awhile and thought they’d have time to go through the process slowly. Whatever was left in the house and sheds that we didn’t want, we could donate to the local Opportunity Shop or the Hospice Thrift Store.

The house was as if Melva had cleaned up after her breakfast and gone for a walk. Everything was clean and in its place, all the rooster dishes on plate hangers lined the kitchen walls. Cabinets held china, glassware, pots, pans, and even food and spices. Drawers contained silverware, cooking utensils, handmade hot pads, and birthday candles. Melva’s mop and broom hung in the closet along with the apron she wore to keep her dress clean. Fabric softener with the picture of a teddy bear on it, sat on top of the washer.

I wandered the house, picking up her things, wondering how she must have felt, leaving them all behind for the last time. Her bed was made with lavender scented sheets and a hand made quilt was pulled neatly under the pillows.

Her toothbrush and tube of toothpaste stood in the china holder at the sink in the bathroom; her shower cap hung on the back of the door. Up in the attic, her canning jars and pressure cookers waited for her to return from the farm stand with beans, or tomatoes, or cucumbers.

I felt like I was breaking Melva’s heart. Oh my, another sign.

Bruce inspected the front window and door locks, the screens on the porch, the attic for leaks and the bathroom for water pressure. All was in order.

The phone rang. “Hello,” Bruce said, then silence. Finally he said, “Sure, we’ll see you at three then.”

My face must have revealed my anxiousness. “It’s alright,” Bruce said to me. “Some of the closing papers haven’t arrived from the bank yet. He’s pushed closing ahead two hours.” Oh no, another sign.

After the inspection, Debbie suggested we go to one of the local restaurants for lunch and listed some gift and art shops we might be interested in visiting. She said we could unhook the trailer and leave it in the driveway. It was no problem.

We returned to McDonalds and ordered from the dollar menu, ate slowly, deciding what we would do with our time until three o’clock. The forecast hadn’t called for rain, only a twenty percent chance of showers. It fell steadily and in driving sheets at times. Bruce, always prepared, had packed tarps for the trailer and covered everything securely before we unhooked from the trailer. Neither of us packed our foul weather gear though, and agreed that thrift store rain coats were in order. We headed to the Opp shop. The coat rack sported two slickers just our size. Was this a good sign? I wondered.

We spent over an hour in the junk shop, browsing, trying to remember what Melva didn’t leave in the house that we might need. We came away with a coffee maker and two mugs. Melva had fancy tea cups and instant coffee.

At three-fifteen we hadn’t heard from the lawyer and I couldn’t stand the suspense anymore. “No word yet,” he said, sounding frustrated. “They emailed wanting to know if you had flood insurance. I’d sent them the policy five days ago, but I re-sent it,” he said. “I’m still waiting to hear from the bank’s closing officer so I can fill out the numbers and email them back to her. Settlement shouldn’t be this difficult.”

“Do you think it’ll still be today?” I asked. “We planned to stay the night at the house. We didn’t make other arrangements.” My heart sank, this was another sign.

“I’ll call the loan officer and let them know that. You call them too. They’ve had every document they need for almost a week. There’s no excuse for this.”

I telephoned our loan officer at the bank. She and I have been corresponding since the process began, and she’s been nothing but helpful. She felt my frustration and assured me that she would stay as late as she needed in the office to make sure that the closing officer had our papers to the lawyer before the end of the day. “You won’t have to drive five hours home tonight, if I have to drive the papers to you from here,” she said.

Bruce and I slogged out to the truck and drove to the beach at Assateague. We parked facing the ocean. I sat silently, watching the waves crash onto the shore under a now gray drizzle of rain. Everything looked deserted, no colorful umbrellas, no children running after beach balls. Even the gulls were hunkered down, looking bleak.

“Do you remember when we bought your Grandma’s house in ’86?” Bruce asked.

“Yeah,” I said, smiling.

“We suffered the same red tape and frustration. It took a week longer to close than we thought it would. Some HUD paper was lost, remember?”

I had to think way back. “Seems to me I do remember,” I said.

“It’ll work out. You worry too much. If we don’t get in tonight, we’ll stay at the Best Western, no big deal.”

I kept looking at my phone, at the time readout, willing the thing to ring. It was almost five o’clock. Didn’t lawyer’s offices close at five o’clock? We opened the cooler and shared a box of raspberries and a banana. I dug around in the glove box and found a plastic spoon. We shared a container of cottage cheese and blueberry yogurt. Bruce scraped the sides of the plastic yogurt box and looked in the cooler again. “Nothing else in here,” he said. “I could go for some seafood.”

“I’m not very hungry,” I pouted.

At five-fifteen I had given up hope and was ready to head to a hotel. We turned the truck around and started for Chincoteague. The phone rang. “I think we’re ready,” our lawyer’s voice said. “Come on to the office; we’ll start signing the papers.”

It took five minutes to get there. Our soggy shoes squeaked our arrival as we hung our slickers to drip from the coat rack in the corner. Mr. West, dressed in his tweed jacket welcomed us with a firm handshake and a smile, then pointed in the direction of the conference room. “I’ll be right with you,” he said. “Just have to make a few more copies.”

We sat down at the long conference table. The windows faced the bay. Ducks waddled through the yard, pecking at something in the grass. Bruce pointed to the sky. “Rain’s on its way out,” he said. “Sky’s getting lighter.” He comes from a farming family. He knows the weather.

Twenty minutes later, after signing what felt like hundreds of forms, Mr. West handed us the keys to our new house, to Melva’s home. We gathered our raincoats and draped them over our arms as we walked to the truck. The sun was shining over Chincoteague Bay. I took it as a sign.

The Inspection

February 10, 2013

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We offered a low bid for Melva’s house. She counter-offered, and the push and pull of home buying began. Finally, we signed a contract contingent upon the home inspection.

We wanted to be there for the walk through, and could only come to the island on the weekend. The inspector squeezed us in on a Sunday morning at the end of August. Our realtor called to let us know that Melva, her daughter, and son-in-law would also be at the house that day, packing.

I imagined Melva’s last weekend in her home of sixty-two years. I saw her walking from room to room, her fingertips sliding across the dark wood furniture she’d polished to a shine over her lifetime, picking up and sorting through her hinged-top sewing box filled with spools of thread, needles, sock darner, and seamstress scissors. I could see her apron-clad figure standing at the gas stove, turning crisp slices of bacon that morning before church. I watched her drink her final cup of coffee at the kitchen table and peer out into her backyard one more time while she washed the dishes.

When we walked into the house, Melva’s daughter, Lynn, and her husband were wrapping photo frames and a collection of fine china in newspaper. Melva was not there. Friends had picked her up for church.

“This is so hard,” Lynn said, shaking her head. “I never thought I’d be packing away my childhood.”

I thought of our place back home, my grandparent’s house, its corner kitchen cupboards built by my grandpa, the water dipper hanging above the sink, the aroma of grandma’s lilacs in spring, my view of the Blue Ridge Mountains from the front window, all my memories. I couldn’t imagine letting go.

Lynn reminisced about the house, and growing up in the neighborhood, aunts, uncles, and cousins, school, church, and the ice cream parlor, all within walking distance. The ocean was only a bicycle ride away, and the island kids used to ride the Chincoteague ponies bareback.

“When Mom and Dad built this place, they had less than five thousand dollars, and decided they would build a fireplace later when they could afford it. It never happened. By the time Mom was forty and gave birth to me, her only child, a fireplace was no longer a priority.”

As we stood and talked, we watched the inspector go from room to room, heard him turn on faucets in the kitchen and bathroom, then pull the attic stairs down and climb up. After a bit, he came down again and exited the front door. The four of us watched him shrug into a disposable white coverall in preparation to slide under the house. We listened as he bumped around under the floor where we stood. Bruce and I paid him little attention as we stayed and talked with Lynn, gathering the history of Melva’s place.

“I’ve always wondered what the hardwood floors would look like under this carpet. I bet they’re stunning,” she said.

Bruce and I finally left Lynn and her husband to their packing and joined the inspector outside in the yard.

“What’s the verdict?” Bruce asked.

I held my breath. I had already fallen in love with Melva’s place. Lynn’s stories had cinched it.

“Nothing worse than what you see with most of these older houses. Contractors didn’t have a specific code for footings and beams under houses back then. There’s some sag under the house, but nothing that can’t be shored up. I’ve seen a lot worse. At least this one has cement footers. Some on the island have oyster shell mixed with mortar as their foundation. Those are the houses with a tilt.”

We’d seen some of those structures. They resembled drawings in a Dr. Seuss book.

“What else?” Bruce asked.

“A few plumbing issues, not enough pressure in the shower and a few leaks under the house. A little rot under there as well, but not too much, easily fixable. That front window needs replacing, but you knew that already. Roof looks like it’s good for another fifteen years or so. Some of your electrical outlets need upgrades. I’ll fill out a report and send it to you so you can get an estimate on the repair cost.”

I sagged with the news. My excitement turned to trepidation; and I began to doubt our decision. Houses involve upkeep and cost, a never ending place to pour money. Something was always breaking at home and trips to the hardware store were weekly events. I was quiet on the way home, estimating costs in my head, thinking about the coastal area, worrying about taxes, insurance, and not living close enough to keep an eye on the place.

While my doubt grew, Bruce’s excitement expanded. It works that way with us. He emailed the inspector’s report to a Chincoteague contractor for an estimate of repairs. Then Bruce began gathering construction and yard tools. He started talking about building a trailer to pull behind the pickup to carry what we needed for the weekend after closing.

Meanwhile, I stepped back, calculating potential costs and tuning to the weather channel to follow every forecast mentioning hurricanes and slow moving low fronts dumping rain. I worried about another flood like the one in 1962. We hadn’t checked the price of propane, or asked how much the electric bill was each month. Water had to be another cost, and what about trash collection?

I closed my eyes and wondered what my husband had gotten me into.

part 5:
https://trainswhistle.wordpress.com/2013/02/17/waiting/

Crunching Numbers

February 3, 2013

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I drove toward home extolling the virtues of Melva’s Place on Ocean Blvd. Perfect size house, wide street with space to park and store the boat trailer, two sheds, and large attic for storage, a house on the island that cost less than any house in our county at home. It was downright cheap in comparison.

Bruce sat quietly in the passenger seat, calculator in hand, punching numbers. “Interest rates are as low as they’re gonna go,” he said. “It’s probably the best time to buy.”

That sounded positive.

“We’ve spent over three thousand dollars in rental and hotel costs since we found the island. Multiply that by ten years. That’s wasted money.”

That sounded positive.

“Chincoteague is in a flood zone. No getting around that. The house is about two and a half feet off the ground. Anything south of Maddox is listed as three feet above sea level, anything north of Maddox is listed as six feet above. Ocean Blvd is just one street south. I’d say it’s probably between three and five feet above. The ’62 flood had six feet of water covering the island.”

That sounded negative.

“Could we move it to the lot, or raise it?”

“I don’t think you’d want to do that, costs too much. We looked at that when we were considering the house on Bunting Road. Remember, this house was built in 1950. It survived the flood of ’62. Gotta have flood insurance though, that’s probably a big cost to think about.”

Darn, another negative.

“Did I mention the workshop?” I asked smiling, “It has electricity and a cement floor, all those woodworking tools.”

“It’ll be the first part of the property under water in a flood too,” he said laughing at my feeble attempt to sway him. At least he was laughing.

We were almost home before Bruce said, “I think it might be a good investment. We could use it to stay in when we come to the island, and rent it out when we’re not there. When I talked to Debbie she said if we rent it to expect eight to ten weeks of rental at eight-fifty a week. That should be enough to pay part of the utilities and taxes. Not sure about cost of insurance.”

This sounded positive. I had gone from mere hoping to imagining pulling into the driveway and spending the night in Melva’s four poster bed.

“I didn’t go under the house, or look at the plumbing and wiring. We’re not even considering buying this property without an inspection. You know what we found under your Daddy’s house when we went to sell it.”

I did remember. Rot and a repair bill to the tune of over fifteen thousand dollars.

“Let’s make a ridiculously low offer and see what happens,” Bruce said.

part 4: https://trainswhistle.wordpress.com/2013/02/10/the-inspection/

Melva’s Place

January 27, 2013

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“Most of the furniture conveys with the house,” Debbie said as we looked around.

The top of Melva’s polished oak kitchen table shone under a porcelain chandelier. Four matching pressed-back chairs were arranged neatly, waiting for a family dinner. A photograph of Melva’s grandchildren smiled at me from a frame on the wall, three boys. Melva liked red apples. Several framed prints displayed baskets of the fruit. Being this close to the seashore, I expected beach pictures. These apple scenes reminded me of home and our mountain orchards.

The living and dining rooms were more formal with a dark drop leaf table, chairs and matching hutch with Melva’s wedding china displayed. Through an arched doorway we found the wall we hoped would have a fireplace. The chimney outside gave us an expectation. We didn’t find one though. A large mirror hung where we expected to find a mantle. Melva’s couch was covered in a gold brocade, matching pillows hugged the sides of the sofa. Two chairs, a ‘his’ and ‘hers’ flanked the couch. Melva’s reclined and rocked.

I opened the closet by the front door. Photo albums lined the top shelf where I imagined hats would be. Ladies sweaters and jackets hung below, smelling of lavender and dusting powder, an aroma so familiar to me, I felt the comfort of my grandmother. I had an overwhelming urge to reach out and embrace Melva’s sweaters.

Her bedroom stopped me at the door. Before me I found the dark wood furniture I knew from childhood, the four-poster bed, vanity with mirror, chest of drawers and nightstand. Even the dresser scarves were familiar. I stood there, my hand to my chest, my mouth open.

“What’s wrong?” Bruce asked, walking up beside me.

“It’s Grandma’s bedroom,” I said.

“Huh?” he said, completely puzzled.

“It’s the same furniture my Grandma had when I was a little girl,” I said.

“I guess they would have been close to the same age,” Bruce said. “It must have been a popular style.”

“I don’t believe in coincidences,” I said.

“I know you don’t. That’s what worries me. Let’s go look at the bathroom.”

The tub and toilet were the heavy porcelain of 1950, and shiny white. The linen closet smelled of cedar, and each towel was folded just so and stacked one on another with washcloths along side.

The second bedroom displayed pictures of Melva’s daughter, son-in-law, and three grandsons. A homemade quilt warmed the double bed. The ginger jar bedside lamp was filled with seashells.

Bruce pulled the attic stairs down and we climbed up. Melva’s attic had dormer windows, unlike my Grandma’s, but the pull string to turn the overhead light on was the same. While Bruce inspected the walls, roof, duct work and furnace, I counted Melva’s canning jars, marveled over her Christmas decorations sparkling from an open cardboard box, and touched the delicate lace of a fancy dress hanging from the rafters. The dry cleaner’s plastic bag had fallen off one shoulder. I wondered where she had worn that dress, to her fiftieth wedding anniversary, to a garden party, to her daughter’s wedding?

“Looks good up here,” Bruce said from the stairs. “Come on down. I don’t want you falling through the hole in the ceiling not looking where you’re going.”

I followed him down the stairs and he folded them back up.

We thanked Debbie for showing us the place on such short notice. “We’ll be in touch,” I said.

Part 3: https://trainswhistle.wordpress.com/2013/02/03/crunching-numbers/

Impulse Shopping

January 21, 2013

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As careful and hesitant as I am, I am disabled by an impulsive streak that flashes its lightning at interesting times. My long-term goals, although still there, fade in the brightness of what’s in front of me. Sparkle captures my eye and sends me wanting. My husband usually grounds me. He listens quietly, then brings me back to the reality at hand. He ticks off the hazards, extols the cost, and after a day or two of processing his words, the careful me returns. I go back to thrift store shopping, gardening, recycling, and saving. I can count the times on one hand he’s let me run the extent of my dream without interference. Those have worked out for me.

Bruce and I didn’t take a vacation last year. With my dad’s illness and death, we’d spent most of my vacation time going back and forth to Chesapeake to check on him, then to make funeral arrangements, and finally to settle his estate. I had gone full force for five months without stopping for breath. I’d yet to have a good solid cry. I was worn out.

“Let’s go to Chincoteague this weekend, just the two of us,” Bruce said the last week in July. The boys will be alright at home. We can take the bicycles, beach chairs, a cooler full of cold ones, and sit on the beach, do nothing but relax in our favorite place.

A year ago we bought a lot on Chincoteague at Big Glade Creek; and made plans to build a house in ten years when we retire. The view is as close to perfection as we have found. Ten years seems a lifetime away, and we continue to visit our little island. Each trip, whether staying in a hotel, cottage, or campground costs us rental bucks. Zoning laws will not allow us camp on our lot. We bought the property knowing that up front. Even so, Bruce threatens to pitch a tent, but I don’t want to antagonize the neighbors.

We arrived on the island a little after daylight on Friday morning and parked at Big Glade Creek. We watched the egrets and geese catching their breakfast. The breeze cooled my skin as I sat cross-legged in front of Bruce on our floating dock. I leaned back against his chest and he rested his chin on my head. “I could sit here forever,” he said.

“Me too,” I echoed.

We checked into the hotel at 3:00, stored our gear and unhooked the bicycles. We rode toward Assateague and then onto the hike/bike beach. We stayed, watching the waves break, until just before sunset. We shared the beach with only six other people, but if we looked straight ahead, it was just the two of us.

Sunday came too soon. It always does. I hate to leave Chincoteague more than I hate paying the one hundred thirty-nine dollars a night hotel cost, but with a five hour drive ahead of us, and work for me on Monday, we pulled out at 11:00. We usually head straight down Maddox Blvd to the causeway over Chincoteague Bay toward the mainland, but there was a small line of traffic up ahead and Bruce veered left onto Pension, then right onto Ocean Blvd. which would take us to Main.

That’s when I saw it, a small white, aluminum-sided house with a brick chimney, on a neat manicured lot. It reminded me of my grandparent’s house. The one we live in now. The bay window was somewhat obscured by an overgrown rhododendron bush, one of my grandmother’s favorite shrubs. The ‘for sale’ sign held a box of leaflets describing the property. “Look at that house,” I said, pointing. “Pull over.”

Bruce parked at the curb and I grabbed one of the leaflets. The house was built in 1950, the same year my grandparent’s home was built. This one had two bedrooms, just like theirs. We walked around the outside and found hydrangeas and crepe myrtles in bloom, ours at home are blooming now. A shop and shed sat on the back of the lot. I peered into the window. Woodworking tools were anchored to the workbench. My grandfather was a carpenter.

“I want to see the inside of the house,” I said.

Bruce looked at me and raised an eyebrow. “If we do, we’ll get back late,” he said, looking at his watch.

I could not explain the connection I felt to this house, but it was there. “Let’s just call,” I said. “At this short notice, they might not even be able to show it. If they can’t, then I’ll take it as a sign and we’ll go home.”

Bruce handed me his cell phone and I dialed Debbie, the realtor who had helped us find our lot last year. She answered on the first ring. “I’ll call Ocean East Realty and get the key,” she said. “I’ll meet you at the property in fifteen minutes.”

Debbie opened the back door and we stepped into “Melva’s kitchen”. The carved wooden sign on the wall proclaimed it to be. My grandmother lived in her kitchen. I remember the tastes and aromas of biscuits baking, strawberry jam and apple pies.

Debbie stepped aside for us. “It belonged to a couple who lived here for sixty-two years,” she said. “Islanders. They built the house just after they were married. Melva’s husband passed away a couple years ago. Melva lived here by herself until June. She’s moved to the mainland to live with her daughter now. They had a hard time putting the house on the market. It’s been Melva’s life.”

As I looked around, I could see that. I could feel it.

Part 2: https://trainswhistle.wordpress.com/2013/01/27/melvas-place/